Separation from your spouse is challenging no matter the time of year, but you may notice their absence more acutely around the holidays. Whether you and your spouse have experienced this before or this is your first time, with a bit of creativity, planning and support from other loved ones, you can find ways to cope with feelings of loneliness and other challenges during the holidays and beyond.
Here are a few ideas for navigating the holiday season without your spouse.
Acknowledge your emotions. Missing your spouse is a common emotion anytime you are separated. However, deployments can complicate those feelings with fears for their safety and uncertainty about the future. Talk to a loved one about your feelings or write them in a journal to help you process them.
Spend time with loved ones. Connecting with your social network is vital when combatting the loneliness that often comes during a spouse’s deployment. Consider spending time with those who also miss your spouse because they can ease feelings of loneliness and help validate your feelings.
Find ways to involve your spouse in festivities. Just because you can’t be together doesn’t mean there aren’t ways to celebrate as a couple. Consider sending a care package or writing detailed descriptions of holiday happenings to send over text or through a letter if you cannot call. Keeping your spouse involved can help you feel more connected and ease some of your spouse’s feelings of homesickness.
Plan for the future. Use the holiday season as a source of inspiration for years to come. Note the traditions you enjoy and new ones you’d like to try. Planning for the future can be a great reminder that what you feel now won’t last forever.
Get involved in your community. If you live on base, consider volunteering with other spouses. Doing so can bring you closer together while offering a distraction. Volunteering with friends and family can lift your spirits even if you don’t live on base. Plus, this will give you something fun and exciting to tell your spouse the next time you talk.
Coping with separation from a loved one can be challenging, but you don’t have to do it alone. If you are married to an active-duty service member, you likely have access to TRICARE insurance, which often covers the cost of professional counseling services. Go to TRICARE.mil to learn more.